The Pathfinding

One way or another…

Nicaragua, Nicarawita

Everybody seems more worried about who will be the presidential candidate, than for the different sufferings all over the country. We have peasants being chased by the military, just because they represent the opposition or are related to an opponent who is either in prison, or was already killed by the government. We have political prisoners who are victims of fraudulent processes to keep them in prison. We have basic services among other household expenses, more and more expensive every month. Nobody is allowed to complain. Strikes are a myth since 2018. No sector, group or even a single person can protest without being captured, harassed, or worse. Even journalists are being constantly harassed, nobody can denounce anything anymore.

But the “opposition” is more interested in fighting each other because all of them want to be “presidents”. Who are they kidding? We all know there will be no fair election process. We all know what’s going to happen: exactly what happened in Venezuela. So why even bother to follow or support any of these leaders who are supposedly representing all the opposition against the regime, when all they have shown so far is that they are no different than the current government? They can’t even agree among themselves.  All they care about is their own personal gain. What do they get from this? Is their benefit aligned with the country’s overall sociopolitical / economic improvement? What do WE as population get from them?

I’m tired of all this, I feel like a slave dressed up as a clown, working unpaid for a circus where nobody goes.

Working for a surveys co.

So, I’ve been trying to make extra money in these companies that pay you for taking surveys, testing products, etc. And it’s been impossible. Why? Because my country is not considered for this simple task. Why? Because no important company using this service seems to care about what a poor country citizen thinks.

And I remembered something I read about, that said that the poor countries continue to be poor because the rich countries don’t give them opportunities to stop being poor.

There’s this book I read by Eduardo Galeano “The open veins of Latin America”, that explains why the rich will always be rich, and us will always be poor.

Anyway, just wanted to get it out of my forever poor system. I’m resigned now, and understand that the opportunities for priviledged humans don’t consider the poor. I understand now I will have to follow the standard conventional / traditional way that all slaves in the corporate world follow. No “other income” opportunity for me.

Nicaragua is dying

When I was little, the popular story was that different liberal and conservative parties got together to run in the presidential elections in 1989 because they knew that unification would be the only way to defeat the sandinista government, which was a left-wing party. Of course there were sacrifices, people had to step back and adopt a selfless attitude, to get to a consent and chose a candidate that represented all the parties involved.

Today, Nicaragua should be doing the same. But, what are we seeing? There are 4 presidential candidates from the opposition. How come these groups cannot achieve that unification that our country needs right now, the one our parents witnessed 30 years ago? All of them want to be presidents, no one wants to give up the title. Greed is ruining our opportunity to get rid of this dictatorship.

Poor countries are meant to die

So, as usual, while reading the news, I found this article explaining why the COVID vaccine is only available for rich countries, and the poor countries will have to wait until 2022-23 to be able to obtain the vaccine. Why? Because of the same reason as it has always been in the human history: only the wealthy matters, the poor does not.

In other news, reminding a bit of the Sick Sad World in Daria’s…. how come all white trash can get into the capitol, armed, and destroying private property, stealing, punching, shooting up people and everything, and they are just peacefully escorted outside?

But in what universe would something like that happen if the riot was of black people? Let’s leave the black people alone…. what if was a muslim mob? What if they were gay? Chinese? Latin?

It’s the same old sh*t. F*cking white supremacy. They call themselves conservative and all they are is a bunch of ignorant haters.

I just hope the meteorite crashes on Earth ASAP and all the suffering ends once and for all. I’m sick of all this same sh*t repeating over and over, all over the world.

I wonder what would John Lennon say about what’s going on right now, not only in the US, but in the world 🤔

The most recent virus that shook the Earth

Once upon a time, when all the elderly were dying because of a virus, and no scientist in the world could find a cure for their disease. Until almost 1 year later, finally some of the richest countries of Earth developed a vaccine.

This was not a magic solution, there were countless resources used for this vaccine development and distribution to all the other countries of the world, and the logistics to apply the vaccine to all population around the world.

The first ones to get the vaccine were the medics, nurses, and first line of response to the virus, then the elderly who were the main target of the virus, and then the rest of the population.

But, of course, all the logistics translates into expenses, it is money, that the poorest countries don’t have. So, all these countries which were already in debt with the international community, now became even more compromised.

Without mentioning all the riots and manifestations all over the world because of the way the vaccination order was being decided. Who should go first? Why? How to discriminate whose life worths the most?

At the end, the world survived. Children were not vaccinated, pregnant women either, nor HIV patients, and other people with chronic diseases. However, they also survived.

Doesn’t it make you wonder how necessary was all that rampage? The vaccine, the money spent, the countries getting into more and more debts, all the commerce affected, millions of businesses closed….

Weekends nights are not fun anymore

I remember 6 months ago, before the pandemic hit us, I could still find something to do on a Friday or Saturday night. I’ve been living alone for more than 3 years now, but I think I’ve never felt more lonely.

I’m bored and don’t have anyone to talk to, can’t go anywhere, can’t do anything, everything is dangerus. I really don’t see me living like this another year.

I’ve tried it all: Tinder, OkCupid, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, Reddit, 9Gag, Youtube, Netflix, I’ve been reading books, learning italian on Duolingo, and of course, WordPress…

I’ve been taking photographs, with my analogue camera, with my digital camera, watching the stars with my binoculars, tried to learn a new song on my guitar, I bought an oven to start cooking more and maybe make bread someday….

Last month I was overwhelmed with work and the university (I’m working and studying) so I was too busy to think of my loneliness, but now work has been low and we’re on vacations from the university, so I feel like that song “I just don’t know what to do with myself”

I’m having sleep problems, I sleep super late, I wake up usually 2 times in the middle of the night, go back to sleep, and then in the morning I don’t want to get up.

I wished I could have some company to share each other’s complaints. We could be sad and bored, but we’d be together, I guess it’s less boring.

Anyway, just wanted to express myself, I’m so damn bored 😦

Good night world!

My natural escape

20200810_115043Everybody shows off their pictures of the beautiful places they visit looking for pure air, nice views, serenity, peace of mind and soul.

Today it was my turn.

As I’m currently having a hard time getting over a significant lost, I decided to go hiking on a volcano.

This is Mombacho. An extinct volcano in Granada, Nicaragua.


It was rainy and misty, we couldn’t see anything in the lookout, but just the sensation of being there at more than 1200 mts high, feeling the breeze on my face, the chill wind, the birds singing and butterflies flying around, it was totally worth it.


I can’t believe I miss him that much


Everytime I look at the sky, it doesn’t matter if it’s night or day; evrytime I listen to any song; whenever I’m reading, or watching a movie; when I’m cooking, when I’m eating, when I shower, when I’m driving, when I’m shopping…. Anything I do, from the moment I wake up ’till I finally fall asleep, I just can’t help it, I miss him so much, I can’t stop thinking of him. Does he think of me too? Is he missing me as much as I am?

I imagine him looking for me, he comes and knocks on my door and I’m happy to see him, I hug him, I kiss him, we cry.

It’s just a dream. It will never be real.

Nothing is happening anymore. I feel like my life is on hold, it’s not moving anymore, I’m like a stone, with no soul, nothing motivates me, I don’t want to do anything. I’m stucked on my memories with him.

This song comes to my mind very often now: “I just don’t know what to do with myself”.


He leído un par de posts acerca de la situación actual en Nicaragua y me he encontrado con la decepcionante realidad de que la mayoría de los que escriben sobre el tema ni siquiera están en el país.

Tengo poco tiempo de haber empezado a escribir en WordPress y casi nunca lo hago, por falta de tiempo, de interés o pericia… Ni siquiera conozco todas las opciones del menú del sitio, ni sé como usarlas, y creo que apenas tengo un seguidor porque le di like a su blog…. De todas formas no puedo evitar expresarme sobre el tema aunque nadie vaya a ver lo que escribo, solo el hecho de expresarme ya es un gran alivio.

Primero que nada, agradezco el interés y el tiempo que estas personas dedicaron de su vida para escribir un par de líneas sobre la crisis que estamos viviendo en mi país; sin embargo, a pesar de que estoy plenamente consciente de la libertad de expresión, me parece un soberano irrespeto que gente que ni siquiera investiga a fondo la situación, se ponga a decir cosas al peso de la lengua solo porque puede.

Solo quienes estamos aquí sobreviviendo día a día el crimen organizado y el terrorismo de estado que nuestros gobernantes nos brindan diariamente desde hace 3 meses, podemos saber lo que está pasando. La ONU, la UE, el Vaticano, todos los gobernantes de los países que han hablado a favor de nuestro pueblo pueden apoyarnos moralmente, pueden condenar el genocidio del que estamos siendo víctimas a manos de nuestro presidente, pueden los EEUU mandar sanciones económicas a ciertos implicados en este terrorismo, pueden algunos periodistas extranjeros solidarizarse públicamente con nuestro sufrimiento, pueden los nicas expatriados llorar y sentir nuestro dolor desde lejos, pero nunca ni una sola persona que no esté viviendo esto en carne propia podrá tener la menor idea de la zozobra en que vivimos, o mas bien sobrevivimos, cada día en mi país.

Saben lo que es ver morir a un compatriota cada 8 horas asesinado brutalmente por quien juró protegernos? Saben lo que es salir de tu casa para ir a trabajar todos los días con miedo de saber si volverás? Saben lo que es que tu vida cambie drásticamente en tan solo unos días, cuando hace tres meses podíamos salir en la noche a cualquier lado sin temor, y es por eso precisamente que muchos salvadoreños y guatemaltecos se han venido a vivir a Nicaragua porque aquí la vida hace tres meses era perfecta! Y ahora ni siquiera podés cruzarte la calle a la venta frente a tu casa sin temor a ser secuestrado, torturado y asesinado, saben lo que es eso? Claro que no!!!! Ninguno está en esta situación, no lo han vivido, y tampoco lo entienden porque no se empapan de información veraz, no saben lo que está pasando, creerán que por ver una noticia en una cadena iternacional donde nos mencionan brevemente ya tienen idea de lo que significa vivir en Nicaragua desde el 19 de abril del 2018, pues no!

Y si alguien realmente interesado en la crisis que estamos viviendo ahorita mismo en Nicaragua quiere comentar algo acerca del tema, los invito a que primero revisen el twitter con el #SOSNicaragua, que es el único lugar donde el gobierno aún no ha podido censurarnos, porque los canales de tv,  las radios locales e inclusive hasta los proveedores de internet, le rinden lealtad al dictador terrorista opresor genocida de Daniel Ortega y no publican nada de lo que está pasando. Es como la historia de Child 44 en la URSS, donde ocultaban los crímenes para que el mundo creyera que era el país perfecto, lo mismo estamos viviendo aquí.


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